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literature
Altamura
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Literature Text
A Spanish lament
blooms in high halls; ... in incarcerated windows
unflowering on the marble almost touching the vines
then pouring and straining in their stony spouse's eyes
through jigsawed cobbled streets. a length of breath away.
... and intermittently pulsing strings The sadness of the World
spray the orange from the lamps sprouts in between the crevasses
painting the cries ripe and full of taste -
and mellowing the sorrow. a feast for crows
and only one plate.
blooms in high halls; ... in incarcerated windows
unflowering on the marble almost touching the vines
then pouring and straining in their stony spouse's eyes
through jigsawed cobbled streets. a length of breath away.
... and intermittently pulsing strings The sadness of the World
spray the orange from the lamps sprouts in between the crevasses
painting the cries ripe and full of taste -
and mellowing the sorrow. a feast for crows
and only one plate.
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A small city in southern Italy. It's name means High Walls.
Questions for Critique:
1. Is the "high walls" metaphore clear enough?
2. Is there any line out of place?
Questions for Critique:
1. Is the "high walls" metaphore clear enough?
2. Is there any line out of place?
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Comments24
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So I'm not big on the poetry thing, so when it comes to breaking up stanzas and having them do crazy things, I don't what to do. Didn't know what to do here, either. So I tried reading it one way, then I tried reading it another. Left to right. Top to bottom. Sideways. Backwards. Bottom to top.
Here's the funny thing, though. It didn't matter how I looked at it. It all came together. That stuff amazes me. And I got a different image from it every time.
I don't know if that's how it's supposed to be. But that's what happened with me, and I love it for that.
Here's the funny thing, though. It didn't matter how I looked at it. It all came together. That stuff amazes me. And I got a different image from it every time.
I don't know if that's how it's supposed to be. But that's what happened with me, and I love it for that.